Rambling

It's a strange process, packing up your material life; putting your worldly possessions into boxes. Seeing which items have the most dust on them, which items you forgot you had or thought you had lost, it's really rather surreal. Since we are still living here until the baby is born we are packing everything except the essentials. Which makes me realize how much excess stuff we have, most of which we don't need or could easily live without. I think it will be nice having less stuff for a while. It will defiantly mean less to clean up! It does make me realize that it wouldn't hurt our family to simplify a bit. Maybe that is what this move is all about? Getting us to focus again, realize what our dreams were/are and helping us simplify. It will be a nice break from the fast paced city to move back to farm life. To have the kids help in the garden all Summer, to smell fresh air and drink crisp mountain well water, it really is a scene I've longed for. Since we've lived in Texas I have made the trip home ever Summer to spend at least three weeks on the farm. Now that stay will be extended and include Kevin!

This is part of my way of not getting sad. I refuse to think about what I'm leaving behind. I keep my focus on getting stuff done, wishing this baby would get out of me and all the things we will get to enjoy in NC. You see in the first five years of our marriage we moved 13 times. Texas has been the longest place we've ever lived. We have become established here. We bought our first house here, made amazing friendships and have become truly settled in our ward. Having to leave that is more emotions than my pregnant self can handle right now. So I just don't think about it. Because honestly, it isn't hard to leave the house, or the city or anything else except our friends. The people who have been our family for the last 2.5 years. Friends I wouldn't trade for anything! So now I'm going to stop talking about it because I'm getting to close to thinking about it.

Tonight is a full moon. They say the full moon puts women into labor...wouldn't that be nice. I'd just like to have my ribs back, be able to sit down or lay down comfortably and not have indigestion anymore. I also am getting to the point where I just want to meet this little guy. I want to hold him (outside of me), I want to touch his little hands, feet and rub noses with him. I want to see what he looks like and I want to snuggle him and thank him for coming to our family.

I guess I better get back to packing. I just sat down to take a quick break. It was nice to just ramble for a bit, really nice.