This year we will have a present free Christmas. I'm not very good at articulating myself, but I'll try to explain. It started years ago. Lathen's second Christmas we decided we couldn't find a place for Santa in our Christmas. We just didn't see a point in lying to our children just to have leverage over them to make them be nice so that they could get more toys that ultimately they don't need. Then slowly we began to feel that we needed to change more. We felt strongly that we should let go of the traditions of our fathers and make new ones. I'm a little ashamed to say that it wasn't easy. We loved waking up Christmas morning to a mountain of presents. The excitement, the stuff...but we began to feel guilty. We knew deep in our hearts that stuff had nothing to do with the birth of our Savior. We prayed a lot and finally we let go of a tradition that is deeply ingrained in our society. We will have no presents Christmas morning.
It hasn't been easy. We have been questioned and criticized. But every time someone says to us, "You don't do Santa and you aren't going to have presents...so, you don't celebrate Christmas?" we know more firmly that we are doing what is best for our family. Santa + presents does NOT = Christmas. Yes, we've heard the bit about how it's about giving and that we get gifts because Christ got gifts. Last time I checked giving is about giving to the needy or giving love and when is the last time you got gifts on some else's birthday...
Anyway, I don't want to start a debate here.
We have decided that for Christmas we will start our own new traditions. This Christmas we will (if all goes to plan) be serving at a soup kitchen in the morning. Then we will read the Christmas story, maybe even act it out. We will be delivering treats to our neighbors and we will be enjoy the company of those we love, our family. Our hope is to enjoy a fuller, happier Christmas by doing what we feel the Savior would have us do.
Kevin and I feel so strongly about this. We have both felt that someday this choice will be a strength to our children and a testimony builder that they will so desperately need in the years to come.
This following video was published by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and I think it helps illustrate what I'm attempting to explain.
The video was followed by these words...
"The gift of Christmas isn't wrapped up in presents or parties. The gift of Christmas is Jesus Christ, the Only Begotten of the Father, the Son of God. As you follow Him, you put people first. You may spend less time in lines and more time serving others. You may spend less money on - and more time with - the people you love. You may lose yourself and you may find everything else that matters."
I would love to hear what traditions you've embraced to improve your worship of the Savior's birth!
Sunday, December 5, 2010
We made a choice.
According to Mommydew at 7:40 PM
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
Joni- Aarik and I do not exchange gifts and we keep our kids gifts to a minimum. We also make efforts to talk about the true meaning of Christmas AND to explain that the gifts our kids get are symbolic of the gifts given to baby Jesus and are more like "party favors: than "birthday gifts" thus we don't need a whole pile. This year we are also making an effort to be like the Little Drummer Boy and do whatever WE have the ability to do to help others as a birthday gift to Jesus Christ. Each family needs different traditions to help them get where they are going and I think it's great you guys are trying this out. Good luck!
I don't feel like I'm lying to my kids by making Christmas feel magical with Santa. I also feel like we incorporate Christ into our Christmas at the same time. Thanks for trying to make me feel bad.
I love it! I remember your post a while back about the point that we already have a day of our own to celebrate us- our birthday. It really got me to thinking and PJ agreed to do the same thing- give our service on that day instead of unneeded gifts. I also loved the Christmas devotional tonight which brought to the table what we can give to Christ on his "birthday". Once again: Brava!
You should check out my sis-in-law's post --
http://www.jonlund.com/blog/Lunds/Jens_Blog/Entries/2010/11/30_Christ-Centered_Christmas_Come_True.html
She's been working really hard on the same concept. Different approach, but along the same idea lines.
Not to say that we aren't focusing on Christ by keeping Santa around. Quite the opposite. We just have our own way of doing it.
Ultimately I think everyone needs to do what works for them. That's actually my life motto -- "Whatever works!" But really, that applies to everyone else as well. Well, it helps me not to judge anyway. Because at the end of the day, I'm only responsible for my own, and that is PLENTY enough for me!! :)
I hope your Christmas goes the way you want it to. I'd anxious to hear the "how-it-all-went report"!
We try to also avoid a lot of the commercialism of Christmas too, but have still allowed some of the fun and imagination of the holiday into our children’s lives. We think that it is healthy and good for their development. We did and continue to teach our kids the “story” of Santa Claus. We have a collection of good books and movies like- “It’s a Wonderful Life” and “Miracle on 34th Street” - movies that are for the whole family that show the good in the world and warmth that comes from this special holiday. All good things come from God- I think that is an important message for our children to understand and be able to distinguish. I think it is important to teach them the difference between the good of the holiday and the vanity of the holiday. That can be done with Santa. We want them to know that Santa represents good- not greed or bribery. It sounds however, that you see Santa differently than that and I think that is fine. It’s all about our different experiences growing up and what we do feel is best.
Christ is the center of our holiday and our home. Each year we still have a Christmas budget that we use to do service projects through out the month. We do 3 a week. Here is a link with some of the things we have used our “Christmas budget” for this year. http://katherinemariephotography.com/blog/archives/7437
Each Sunday during the month of December, we have a special family meeting about the Savior.
1st Sunday: Attend the Broadcast together
2nd Sunday: We have the goal to finish the Book of Mormon as a family and pray about it that night. So far we have done this for 8 years in a row- a beautiful tradition!
3rd Sunday: We invite friends over for a special fireside in our home where we all share stories of Christmas and have cookies and coco.
4th Sunday: We have a themed Bethlehem dinner and prepare our family “musical.” Our musical is the gift we give to families in our ward and community on Christmas Eve and Day. We prepare a 5 min door to door program with songs, scriptures and costumes. One year we even shared it with a store clerk at a CVS! My children still love planning this and doing it each year.
On Christmas morning, we give our children one thing they need-like a new notebook for school, one thing to wear- a new dress or tie for church, and one thing to read- a special book just for them. Those are the 3 gifts they receive on Christmas morning. We explain that that these gifts represent gifts of the Savior- he has provide a way for our physical needs to be met- (the needed gift), our spirits to be healed (new “sacrament” meeting clothes) and minds and eyes to grow (book.)
The fun of the holiday is still there, the spirit of the holiday is still there and Christ is strengthening our family because we are remembering Him and doing these things as a family.
We have found it was easier to keep gifts and even Santa in our home- because we have been willing to teach our children the truth about their purpose. The truth is- they are not the reason for the Christmas Holiday- they are the beautiful details that connect the world to one another. My children are teenagers now, and I feel they are happy and well rounded- they are wonderful examples of service and love. I don’t feel like they became that way by taking away gifts- but rather- teaching them how to receive and give them.
Good luck with your young family and making these decisions. They are so important and I can tell that your hearts and desires are in the right place-
Best Blessings!
Bev
Post a Comment